ByN. Lothungbeni Humtsoe

May 9, 2021 (IANSlife) For generations, mothers have been a force of nature doing the heavy lifting when it comes to raising children right; keeping them safe and teaching them the rules of society. 

And while most might say, “Mothers across generations have been the same”, we beg to differ. Most mommies have been undergoing a tectonic makeover. In addition to the trademark gooey love-filled center, there is a growing brigade of mothers today who exhibit a sharp cast- iron brand of grit and self-love.

Having moved far away from the self-deprecating martyrdom, more moms around the world are becoming role-models of self-love. And self love is tied deeply to confidence and how your life turns out. The gumption to live the most authentic lives comes from self love and positive body-image. 

So more power to the evolved moms and their children. However there are still many amongst us that remain self-critical. This next information might interest them— according to a research paper by Utah State University titled "Body Dissatisfaction and Weight Bias in Children", body dissatisfaction begins around age five for girls, and seven for boys! Wow! Evidently moms have a specific influence on the way their children see themselves.

But before we get all judgy, these mothers don’t have it easy either. After a lifetime of being at the receiving end of their own share of , “You are too thin, too jiggly, too dark etc loving their bodies is tough enough. And once the baby comes, this message amplifies with suggestions to “quickly bounce back”. So much so that “You don’t look like you have just delivered” is a compliment in our world. No wonder then that some moms continue to be preoccupied with their body image and then go on to raise children who mimic their limiting beliefs. 

How about changing it once and for all this mothers day! Stuti Sethi, Senior Marketing Manager , Pureplay Skin Sciences  devises a plan to unlearn these behaviours. 

When the mind says critical things about your post-pregnancy body
 Look at your baby. You made that! Those stretch marks are like a badge of honor that came from your body and your heart making room for your little one. Lovingly run your fingers over them and be proud to bear them.

Don’t get played by marketing
Anytime you look at a magazine cover or an advertisement that makes you feel bad about your body, remind yourself that real bodies aren’t supposed to look that way. Also, unsubscribe please.

Unfollow social media accounts
That push perfection. Instead choose ones that promote wellness, fitness, good eating habits and mental health. You don’t actively seek out phone conversations with mean friends who make you feel bad about yourself…same logic

There is more to you that your weight, dimensions & complexion
There are simply so many ways to express your creativity, learn new exciting things and make a difference. Find your unique gifts and share them with the world. Do what makes you happy. 

Modeling positive behaviour in today’s world is not so tough. There is a lot of support— there are role-models, brands, and offerings that simply refuse to scarf down the diminishing narrative of “you are not good enough as you are''. And the wonderful benefits that unfold from body positivity are tremendous and many.

The confidence and self-esteem help you reach one accomplishment after another, your relationships are healthier (since your relationship with yourself is healthier) and the best outcome of all is the children you raise are happy, self-assured and well-adjusted, who understand the importance of being able and kind instead on simply being the prettiest ones in the room!

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N. Lothungbeni Humtsoe can be contacted at lothungbeni.h@ians.in