ByKuhoo Gupta
August 5, 2020 (IANSlife) Despite the country being in Unlock3.0, social distancing norms, lockdown imposed protocols and home sheltering have awkwardly exacerbated the freedom, routine and responsibilities within households of many estranged family members.
Owing to an alarming surge in Covid-19 cases, there are still millions of families and households around India who are struggling with these worries, stressors and uncertainties. Frequent, hostile conflict, along with increased uncertainty and financial burden has lowered the window of tolerance within families.
Many spouses are bickering as old wounds fewer and children are struggling with behaviour typified by belittlement, domination, lies and control. They are propelled to experience dysfunctional and strained family interactions, day in and day out, without the solace of distraction and lack of distance for relaxation.
Where once many of us could walk away from household tension, we are now obliged to stay within the same walls. Emotions are running high, arguments are exploding and the confusion continues with each other’s flaws, which leads to self-destructive and defeating behaviours.
With the ongoing pandemic, heightened anxiety and stress in general means that emotions and anger aren’t being processed in the same way because there is a greater degree of variability in how multifaceted energies are interacting and behaving within the homes. These energy interactions form the core of our family dynamics. Each family member has a unique set of energy codings that affects the way each member thinks and relates to oneselves, others and the environment around him or her.
Several factors, including the nature of a parent’s relationship, clash of personalities, events (divorce, death, unemployment), culture and ethnicity (including beliefs about gender roles), influence the energy dynamics, due to which we become vulnerable to negative consequences due to emotional energy imbalance within the members at home.
Here are some tips to defuse conflicts and manifest preserve relationships at home.
Lastly, it is imperative to not feel guilty about the lack of congruence between the expectations of family roles, finding time for oneself and doing things that make us happy; because if we are not at peace inside, everything in our environment will seem to be in a state of catastrophe. And when we have no control over the context, what we can change is only ‘ourselves’, our ‘thoughts’ and our ‘energy patterns’!
The sooner you de-escalate a fight and work on balancing real energies, the sooner you can begin working on real solutions which involve both engaging family members in the same positive energy system and changing the energy system as per the preference to better accommodate their needs.
The balancing of energy will make you strive and help you to create an environment in which everyone feels safe, heard, loved and respected. Such households are often characterized by low conflict, high levels of support and open communication.
(Kuhoo Gupta, Healer and Founder of The K Junction)
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